Find your third place

Find your third place:

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Find your third place.

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Heard this concept twice in the last few days.

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Had never heard of it before.

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We mostly live in two spaces.

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1 is our home.

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The second is our work.

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During Covid, that became one.

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There was no separation between work and home.

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But the biggest loss was the third place.

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The third place is another place outside your house or work where you can relax.

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A workout class.

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A dance class.

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A friend’s house.

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A coffee shop.

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A country club.

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Somewhere where you can socialize with people outside of work and home.

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The concept was coined by Ray Oldenberg in his book ‘The Great Good Place’

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We need them more than ever.

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Loneliness is an epidemic.

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It’s a public health crisis.

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It increases your risk of death more than smoking a pack of cigarettes.

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Seriously.

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Social media has made us less social.

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It’s forced us to look down instead of what’s around us.

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It’s ruined our social skills.

It’s made us nervous in crowds.

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It’s made us anxious about speaking to strangers.

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It’s made us more depressed, scared and suicidal.

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How do we get out of it?

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We need more spaces for community.

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More places where people can interact.

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Heard this concept in an interview recently about the idea of national service.

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Israel has it.

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Korea does.

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Same with Singapore.

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All those countries mandate national service after high school before you go to university.

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Some people hate it, but I’m sure everyone’s so thankful for those experiences as an adult.

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Bonding with people you don’t know.

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Improving your social skills.

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Learning with strangers.

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All of these are beneficial experiences as you grow up.

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We’re losing those moments more than ever.

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Making new friends as an adult is hard.

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It’s uncomfortable.

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It’s difficult because you have to step outside of your comfort zone.

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You have to get out of house and where you work.

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You have to go try new things.

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You have to be physically present with other people around you.

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We’re losing that as a society.

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The decline of religion and community centres isn’t helping.

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How are we going to fix this?

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I’ve been thinking about this idea of creating physical spaces.

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Places where people can come meet other people who share similar interests.

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There’s got to be a better way to get people together than what you have behind a screen.

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Humans are social creatures.

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We need to be around each other.

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Not digitally but physically.

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Go find a place outside of your house or office.

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Go find your third place.

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